Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones (#2)

By R.A. Salvatore

THE SHORT

As R.A. Salvatore tries to rescue this mess of a film, he inadvertently dives too deep into the source material. This book is bogged down by the talk-y parts appearing in every single chapter. Too much time is dwelt of Anakin and Padme, unsuccessfully, as well as on Shmi Skywalker, to whom Salvatore devotes the first two chapters to. Also, the book is devoid of interesting things and action scenes, as after the speeder chase (which, by the way, was entirely boring and worthy of more than a few eye rolls), the next fight sequence doesn't occur until Obi-Wan engages Jango, more than THREE-QUARTERS into the book! From then on, it rushes towards the ending in a sped up version of the film. The only thing this book manages to capture in an original way is Jango's and Boba's relationship, and Boba kneeling beside his father's helmet is probably the most emotional moment in this novel. One grieves the lack of originality in Salvatore which was so abundant in Brooks.

THE REVIEW

First off, let's begin with the main trio, Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Padme Amidala. As usual, Obi-Wan is the most charismatic of them, as Anakin and Padme canoodle into each other in a forced love story. But more on that later. Obi-Wan is by far the most enjoyable character in this book, as Salvatore successfully manages to capture his playful yet stern character and put it into word form. However, one feels a bit let-down at the use of Obi-Wan, as he is shoved aside to make room for Padme and Anakin. Salvatore could have done so much with him, but his potential is lost. As for Anakin and Padme, no amount of excellent writing could make the love story between them true, but Salvatore certainly tries. While he does succeed to a certain extent, he limits himself by remaining within Lucas's view. As such, their relationship never takes off, and the part where Sola teases Padme about Anakin's feelings for her is so cheesy that it turns into some kind of middle school love story. Anakin's indecision between the light and the dark side, is, once again, oddly missing in this novel, except for when he kills the Tuskens. For these 2-dimensional film characters, Salvatore manages to balance them on their edge, but then they just fall flat on their faces.

Now for the main villains, Count Dooku, and, to a smaller extent, Jango Fett. Jango only appears to kill Zam Wesell, and then spends much of his time in Kamino, resulting probably the tensest exchange in Star Wars history, between himself and Obi-Wan Kenobi. Then he gets his head lopped off. Oh well. Count Dooku doesn't even show up until the book is nearly over, and this becomes a quickly zoomed through lightsaber duel, a few words with Darth Sidious, and then bam! Done until the next Star Wars. Again, these characters are, all too familiarly, undeveloped and un-fleshed out.

This leaves us with vague Yoda predictions about the dark side, over and over and over and over again! The enigmatic Yoda we all know and love from Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back is now just there to say some stuff so that we don't get bored. Mace Windu is only there to ask questions about the dark side that he really should know, and this bores the hell out of one. While Salvatore tries to bring these two great Jedi Masters into the picture, he really just can't do it, and they, too, flop uselessly on the page.

Oh, and there's Jar Jar Binks. WHY IS HE STILL IN THESE DANG THINGS?????????

So now let's move on to the pacing of this book. In this book, the pacing is so uneven, it plays slooooooooooooooooooow for a huge part of the book, dealing us some of the talk-iest bits of the Star Wars franchise, even more so than Brooks' novel (which was actually quite good), as Amidala sits and talks about politics. Yoda and Mace Windu sit and talk about the dark side. Anakin and Padme sit and talk about their feelings for each other. Count Dooku sits and talks about the separatist movement. Chancellor Palpatine sits and talks about the Republican Army. (By the way, how do they still not see he is the Sith Lord?) This continues for about half of the book, dragging its feet, becoming thoroughly unreadable in the process. And then, Salvatore ramps things up to a freaking glossed over Battle of Geonosis, which was supposed to be the climax of this thing! 

As it is, the Battle only happens in the last 50 or so pages, and the awesome duel between Yoda and Dooku in the film is dumbed down to a few paragraphs in the book, severely cutting off our source of enjoyment. Salvatore rushed too much, and so that epic tense moment when Yoda just whips out his lightsaber and just flicks it on is lost because Salvatore didn't have enough page space after Anakin and Padme. And then Salvatore just tries to finish it all off with an epilogue that isn't really an epilogue, more like a sneak preview of the next book. 

Now let's take a look at the plot. Almost wished I didn't. The plot is so complicated, and dumb, and idiotic that it leaves me saying "What? Who cares? Who? Separa-wha? Count who again?" Way too much time of this book is spent on boring stuff like Senate politics, Padme and Anakin's love story, the Chancellor, and Yoda-predictions (aka Yodictions). The plot is so severely flawed, that Salvatore didn't have time to even question the basics of his novel. Also, it is convoluted, what with political techniques, and enemies, and Trade Federations, and allies, and armies, and it all messes with your brain, until you really have to wonder if this really was the same guy who made your favourite three sci-fi films. Salvatore sadly suffers from a lack of originality, sticking much too close to the source material. Really, a good film adaptation should take a new spin on the film, but still staying close to the film itself. They said Dragon Ball Z: Evolution had nothing to do with the source material? Well this dang book has everything to do with it!

By now, the world-renowned exposition, climax and resolution plot device rather looks like this:

EEEEEEEXXXXXXXXPPPPPPPPPOOOOOOOSSSSIIIIIITTTTTTIIIIIOOOONNNNNNNN,
climax, resolution. Sigh.

At least Salvatore managed to capture the essence of Jango Fett and his relationship with Boba, being one of a proud and satisfied daddy. Salvatore managed to bring alive what George Lucas couldn't, the complex chemistry between a bounty hunter and his clone, fleshing it out beautifully, showing us the side of Jango we never knew, but not overdoing it like he did with Padme. As such, Boba kneeling on the grounds of Geonosis is the most powerful moment in this novel, bringing life to this film adaptation.

All in all, it's not for lack of trying that Salvatore failed. It's more to do with the fact that the source material wasn't that great to begin with. 8 out of 10 for effort, Salvatore, but as for the writing, there seems to be room for improvement.

Rating: 7.6/10
Advice: Someone cut out all the Jango and Boba scenes and make it into a short story. That would be so much better.

Well, a film can only be made good up to a certain extent. I regret this effort on Salvatore's part, but it just isn't enough to capture the essence of the original trilogy.

Next post: As I move from sci-fi to fantasy, come back next week as I journey to Shannara, in my review of The Sword of Shannara. I really haven't read this one yet, so I'm just as excited as you are to find out how it reads! Will it be a thrilling escape to a fantastic world, reminiscent of The Lord of the Rings yet subtly different enough? Or will it become a flop that will eventually fade into obscurity? Find out next week in my review of The Sword of Shannara!!!

Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (#1)

By Terry Brooks

To clear up any confusion, I am reviewing the BOOK, not the movie. I just couldn't bring myself to watch it again. The pain, oh the pain. But anyway.

THE SHORT

This novel bursts onto the page with the explosive description of the Podrace, where a desperate Anakin Skywalker smashes out. With all the energy he can muster, Brooks manages to fill the pages with life and action, successfully redeeming the epic failure that was the movie. He couldn't quite get rid of Jar Jar Binks, however, because the irritating Gungan stills shows up to put a thorn in your side. All the mystery of the invasion is preserved by Brooks' masterful writing, and he somehow cuts away all the boring Senate talks and keeps the ones that matter, Palpatine's sudden rise to power and his machinations being to fruit. Darth Maul gets more lines in the book, and this increases the menace of the horned Dathomiri. The pages of this book are filled with action and tenseness, although nobody can quite get around Lucas' Binks. All in all, this was a fun read. Not a great plot, but for a movie adaptation, it certainly lives up to the expectation of Star Wars. Maybe Brooks should have written the screenplay.

THE REVIEW

The main character of this novel seems, this time around, to be Obi-Wan Kenobi. He certainly appears for most of the book, while Anakin only appears for bits of the first half and then on for the second half. Qui-Gon dies in the end, and one feels that the Jedi Master isn't the focus of the book. Obi-Wan demonstrates his annoyance with Qui-Gon when the latter keeps Binks and Skywalker, and he is eventually the one who defeats Darth Maul. Obi-Wan changes throughout the course of the book, first from an insolent Padawan who doesn't listen to his master, then at the end to a battle-worn Jedi Knight who has seen death in the eye and faced it. The character development, however, isn't so explored by Brooks, who perhaps has other things on his mind. The development is still there, but it is still subtle. Obi-Wan is the definitive Jedi, one who will fight the dark side and never give in, strong in the light side of the Force.

Unlike Anakin. Already, Anakin shows his emotions and his inability to control his emotions to obtain the serenity required for a real Jedi when he leaves his mother. Crying, he refuses, but the separation is necessary. Then again, he shows fright and indecision during the battle of Naboo where he should never have BEEN! Podracing is really all Anakin does in this movie, podrace and cry. His blowing up the Trade Federation is more of Lucasian plot device than a test of skills and the Force as it was in A New Hope. It was pure luck, and he didn't even know what he was doing! At least Luke was an established pilot at 19. Anakin is a dumb, lucky 9 year old who thinks flying in space is the same as podracing!

Darth Maul, is, despite Brooks' best efforts, still underdeveloped for the main villain of the story. It can't be the cowardly Nute Gunray and Rune Haako, and Darth Sidious technically is just a hologram telling them what to do. The final confrontation with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan is excellently described and gives a lot to the imagination, lending Brooks' fantasy writing skills to the deadly whirling lightsabers. The menace is strong with Maul, just sadly not visible.

One of the main themes in this book is the idea of Fate. Anakin dreamt of becoming a Jedi, and in the end he did. But look at the extraordinary set of circumstances required for him to meet Qui-Gon: First, the battle droids had to hit the hyperdrive on the Nubian. Then, Qui-Gon had to decide to land on Tatooine, and coincidentally near MOS ESPA!! And then, Qui-Gon had to visit Watto, Jar Jar had to eat the frog, Anakin had to come in and save Jar Jar, a sandstorm had to come, and then ONLY could Qui-Gon meet Anakin! The probability of this happening is infinitely small! But then, maybe it enhances the idea of Fate. Perhaps it's called the Force. Or maybe just pure coincidence. Qui-Gon wants us to believe that it's the Force, while Brooks' calls it Fate. Maybe there's a destiny out there for us, giving us hope. Perhaps that's what this book brought us.

I really shouldn't be discussing the plot here, but it's an integral part of this book, and so I will. While the plot may seem a bit difficult at times to understand, just remember this is all in the world of Star Wars. The plot may shift from Naboo to Tatooine, and back to Naboo, but in the second half it starts to straighten out. Darth Sidious sends Maul to Naboo, and everyone arrives back in time for the final war. The plot is logical and leads from one area to another, and Brooks even adds in a few parts that weren't in the movie but link up to Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones. Full of action, the plot makes energy its main priority, but in doing so foregoes some of the emotions of the humans and aliens in the movie. It might move too fast, shuffling between planets, between the Trade Federation and Mos Espa, and in the end, Brooks has to keep things moving, and as such the depth of humanity in the aliens, or whether they can feel them is not explored, and even the humans seem like plot devices at some point or another.

But yet again, this is a science-fiction novel, and Star Wars is known for its action scenes. This isn't a philosophy thesis (Though it does sound interesting: Do the aliens in Star Wars have human feelings?). The plot is enough to sustain us with its action scenes, and let's admit it, that's all we want from a Star Wars book. In conclusion, the plot is really shifty at times, but it lives up to expectations, delivers the main parts of the movie, and yet includes new bits, all evidence of a fine book.

Some editions, have a special short story by James Luceno tacked on to the end. The title is Darth Maul: Endgame, and while I shall not be reviewing it here, I can certainly say that the short story is enjoyable and makes for a good 10 minutes reading, going deeper into one of the most poorly developed characters of all time, by what some consider to be one of the best at writing Star Wars books.

All in all, Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace was an enjoyable read, and for those seeking an apology from Lucas for the movie, they may well find it in Terry Brooks' novel.

Rating: 8.4/10

Advice: An excellent companion to the movie, and a must-read for all Star Wars fans.

I still remember the boredom of the movie, and I'm still trying to wipe it from my memory. Anyhow, I really enjoyed this book. Really, really, really enjoyed it. I think fantasy authors might do just as well in science-fiction too. Or maybe that's just one of the talents of Terry Brooks.

Next week: Katniss Everdeen finds herself trapped in a deadly arena where kids fight to the death in Suzanne Collin's dystopic novel, The Hunger Games.