Twilight (#1)

 By Stephenie Meyer

THE SHORT

Basically, Twilight is every teenage girl's dream. Hot guy comes and falls in love with her and saves her from some unexpected danger. Meyer creatively rethinks the myth that are vampires, although the back page kind of spoils it (I mean, really? Spoiling who Edward is? Not a great plan). At times, though, Meyer's story is bogged down by unrealistic and too descriptive sentences, resulting in awkward clauses and unfamiliar sentence structures that do nothing for nobody. The plot meanders aimlessly around for a huge part of the book, and speeds up to a rushed climax involving tons of sitting around, more sitting, and more waiting. The climax is resolved far too quickly, and Meyer tries to distract people from this by putting more heavy-handed kisses and blah blah blah lovey-dovey stuff. While the love story was ok at first, Meyer bogs the whole story down by repeating the same thing over and over again. Overall, not a very thrilling debut.

THE REVIEW

First off let's visit Bella. A rather forgettable person, bland and boring, Meyer repeats the same old "You're Special, Kid!" cliche from way better books like "Lord of the Rings", "Harry Potter", etcetera etcetera, by making Edward strangely fascinated by her. There is no actual character development in Bella, she pretty much remains the same throughout the whole novel, with no life-changing realisation, or things that make her stand out from the page. Meyer actually never fleshes out Bella, but perhaps that was a ploy to make Bella seem...well, blander. Nevertheless, she remains on the page, a boring character to spend time with and with an even more boring narration throughout.

Next on our list is Edward. Due to us being stuck in Bella's first person perspective, we never see any of Edward's actual flaws. This reduces us to merely seeing what Bella thinks of him, which is terribly predictable. By presenting to us some of Edward's flaws, Meyer might have fleshed out the character, making him far more interesting than Bella. As it is, Edward remains a pretty face. Such a wasted potential, especially when Meyer devoted so much of the book to explaining her new form of vampire.

Now for the main villain. There actually isn't much of a main villain, except for James, who we never get to know, and Victoria, who we never even SEE apart from that glimpse in the baseball field. We never get to go INSIDE James, to understand his motives, to see what makes him, well, him! As such, James never becomes the truly menacing villain he is meant to be, and the epic climax that we all thought would be between vampires, is instead reduced to a couple of chapters of James hitting Bella, and then Edward sucking blood? What? Come on, we just wanted to see vampires fight each other to the death! Now that would be cool! Blood-ttle Royale!

Looking at the theme now: Wait, there isn't one! This whole novel is devoid of meaningful themes, unlike so much better novels with the theme of belief, responsibility, and so on! Basically what Meyer is saying is that you should probably forget this book as soon as you read it, and that it will have absolutely no bearing at all on your life.

The one part actually worthy of praise is Meyer's rethinking of the classic vampire myth, defined by Bram Stoker's Dracula, and continued for many thousands of years, Meyer breaks all rules in the vampire handbook while also paying homage to the many myths which surround the vampires. In her imaginative remake, which is probably the only thing which keeps this book afloat, vampires are suddenly shockingly attractive creatures. I have to applaud Meyer for this creative version of the vampire, and this is probably the only thing that links and binds this story together as a whole, the reader anxious to know more, more about the mysterious history of this strange new species. Absolutely impeccable. Simply brilliant.

But now to dive down into the depths of darker things. The plot here is messy and incoherent, and is so unevenly paced, it moves from boringly slow to breakneck pace by the end of the book. And then, just as the rushed ending comes, it ends as abruptly as it began, leaving readers feeling disappointed and completely ripped off. You mean I read through that 400 page love-fest for a few pages of action??? GAAAAAHHHHH!!!

Also, the plot is aimless for a major amount of the book, and then for absolutely no reason at all, introduces a villain at the last possible second and then have him want to suck the blood out of Bella. This move by Meyer is completely illogical and feels like a wrench thrown into the works of this novel (Not that the works were completely perfect to begin with). The end bit feels tacked on, as if Meyer was rushing and said to herself, "Hey, you know what? I need a sudden villain, but I'm too lazy to develop him over the book! Yeah! Let's go do that!"

All in all, Twilight isn't the best vampire book. Not by far. Major holes in character development and plot bring it down, but luckily, the update of the vampire to modern society is its saving grace.

Rating: 5.8/10

Advice: Perhaps start with Stoker's Dracula. Unless you're a teenage girl who wants to fantasize about hot guys picking you off like you're really special. Because really, that would be the only category of the human species to whom this book would appeal to.

Sigh. Now I really regret struggling through that 400 page book. What a disappointment.

Next two weeks: H.G. Wells mania! That's right, you heard it! With my foray into the genre of science-fiction, I pick up two of the most beloved sci-fi classics of all time: The Time Machine and The War of the Worlds for two straight weeks! Watch as a Victorian scientist is propelled into the future next week in my review of The Time Machine and witness the invasion of Martians the following week in my review of The War of the Worlds! Will these two classics hold up? Or will they fall short of expectations? Find out in the next two weeks!